Peace vs. Growth

The following are two different sets of quotes, all said by people that I highly respect.

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“If you remain neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor. If an elephant has his foot on the tail of a mouse and you say that you are neutral, the mouse will not appreciate your neutrality.

-Bishop Desmond Tutu

Ïf you cannot fly then run, if you can´t run then walk, if you can´t walk then crawl, but whatever you do, you have to keep moving forward.¨

-Martin Luther King Jr.

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“If you are pushing yourself and others around, you have not yet found the secret of happiness. Know that things are okay as they are. This moment is as perfect as it can be…When we are manipulating, changing, controlling, and fixing, we have not reached enlightenment. The calculating mind is the opposite of the contemplative mind.”

-Richard Rohr

“I call you during these days to sit under a tree and be quiet and to learn that it’s okay to be the way you are.”

-Jean Vanier

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While all of these statements are beautiful, they seem to be contradictory. How can you be at peace, while also struggling to make things better? How do you tranquilly accept the reality while also recognizing that we must continue searching for answers, moving forward, and challenging ourselves and the world to improve?

I have been thinking about this a lot especially lately. I would say that I am finally at a point in my time here in Nicaragua that not everyday is a struggle. In general I feel happy and at peace. For example, we recently went on a 3 day silent retreat to Laguna de Apoyo (a breathtaking crater lake outside of Managua). Normally I would use this time to try and sort out some big question or confusion or difficulty that I am experiencing here, but for some reason I just found myself being happy, content, thankful, and at peace in the moment. At first I felt guilty, like I wasn´t taking advantage of this time to reflect. But then I realized that what I was feeling was beautiful, and that I should just let it happen.

But after retreat we each had a phone conversation with the JVC office, and some of the questions were about growth--where would we like to grow in our next few months here in Nicaragua? This stumped me a bit. I know so much of being here is about growth, and it is true that I have grown in so many ways. Our community even has a phrase for all those challenging growing moments: AFGO…(Another Freaking Growth Opportunity). :) But how do I incorporate that struggle and growth into my life without losing the inner peace? How do I challenge myself to be better and still lovingly accept the finite human being that I know I am? Where is the line between peaceful acceptance and complacency? And then even if I SOMEHOW discern these answers for myself…applying it to the world around me gets even more complicated and tricky! How do I challenge others but also love and accept them for where they are at?

Maybe part of the answer is that even though we are at peace, we still must be awake and paying attention. I just read that Buddha in Sanskrit means ¨I Am Awake.¨ We must have our eyes, ears, hearts, and minds open to ourselves and the world around us, noticing the stirrings and happenings in both. Peace and tranquility must not mean inaction or stagnancy. I suppose a truly at peace person would move forward and grow by seeing a challenge, simply recognizing it as a reality, and then moving forward with the next correct action without harsh judgment or negativity towards themselves or others. It simply is, and we simply must react. And maybe when it comes to that step of challenging others, we just have to make sure that no matter what, the challenge comes from a place a love—not fear or anger or needing to be right—but rather a genuine love for that person and wanting them to find a better version of themselves or a better way to deal with a situation. 

But whatever the actual answer is, I do know that during my time here in Nicaragua I have felt the truth that can be found in each of those previous quotes. I am still trying to figure out how to meld the two together and find the balance and harmony that I know must exist there between acceptance and growth, but hopefully one day I will make it there..or at least close. :)

I’ll leave you with a couple quotes also. :)

“ You must not worry if those around you aren’t doing their best. Just worry about how to make yourself worthy. Doing your best is the surest way to remind those around you to do their best. But to be worthy requires the continuing practice of mindfulness. Only by this practice will we not lose ourselves but acquire a bright joy and peace.”

-Thich Nhat Han

“We cannot do everything, and there is a sense of liberation in realizing that. This enables us to do something, and to do it very well. It may be incomplete, but it is a beginning, a step along the way, an opportunity for the Lord’s grace to enter and do the rest.”

-Archbishop Oscar Romero

(man I just realized that all of those quotes are from men….I have to go read some Dorothy Day or something…)